It’s just hard to muster the energy to try anymore. Because when I do, it just leads to feeling more and more ostracized by the ones who are supposed to care for me the most. I shouldn’t have to put effort in areas that are needing it, because I never had to until now. I miss the self-sustaining state things used to cycle in. It feels like a competition, and I just want to drop out. I don’t want to try, because when I do, I remember why I didn’t want to in the first place.

So I don’t.

1:38 am  •  5 February 2012  •  2 notes